Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Melanoma

Posted: June 16, 2013 in Uncategorized

Realized after chatting with a new friend tonight that I never wrote my post about my melanoma-skin cancer issue.

I had this ‘heart shaped’ mole the size of a large pencil eraser on my face for about 4 years. 2 years ago I went to a dermatologist to get it looked at. He said no worried, no cancer, did nothing.  Well it got bigger and started changing it’s look.  So I went in March to another dermatologist and immediately that doc said “definitely we will take that off today and biopsy it”. Well he did. They sent it off for biopsy. And 3 days later I got the call that I had cancer. 😦

Well I ended up going in for surgery May 7&8 (last month) to remove the WHOLE cancer from my face.  It’s on my cheek area.  So needless to say, long story short, cancer is gone. and I have a huge LONG scar from my temple down to my jawline. Scar massage starts the end of this week to get rid of 3 layers of stitches underneath the skin. Doc says this will hurt but is necessary.

I did not realize how bad my melanoma was. Until I see the scar. And get upset. Bad. I was left out of the house on the hot hot days of summer. Mom says ‘don’t come in til it’s dark’ So we’d sit outside all day. No sunscreen.  The doc looks at you like I’m a fake-baker, tanner, etc. Nope. Not this girl. Just neglected.

So that’s my melanoma story. WEAR your SUNSCREEN!  Protect yourself.  One more thing to add to my past crap. LOL.

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trauma counseling

Posted: May 1, 2013 in Uncategorized

I just finished week 3 of my trauma counseling. Actually we really have not ‘started’ it yet. The first 2 weeks were intake. This week we set goals to work on. I get this counseling for 6 months. We’ll see how it goes. I hope everyone is doing OK. My meds seem to be OK, working OK.

Just Because……

Posted: March 26, 2013 in Uncategorized

Just Because…….

Happy Little Clouds

Posted: January 25, 2013 in Uncategorized

Happy Little Clouds.

Why you hate yourself and think you deserve to suffer.

A passionate heart.

Posted: January 16, 2013 in Uncategorized

A passionate heart..

the 27th-another day

Posted: December 27, 2012 in Uncategorized

I managed to stay out of the hospital yesterday, despite my mood yesterday.

I was very down yesterday.

Thinking about the past a lot.

Went to my trauma skills group last night and that sort of pulled me out of it.

I am learning about ‘mindfulness’ lately at skills group.  I am enjoying this. It’s sort of a review for me.  I’ve heard of it before, just really did not understand so much. Now it’s becoming clearer to me.

I am glad the holidays are almost over-New Year’s and all. My 41st bday is the 29th. Never happy about that. Hubby wants to take me out to eat. I told him no.  Lately I’m socially very anxious in public. Not sure why. I’m on pills now, double the dose. Maybe they just haven’t kicked in yet or maybe I need more or a different med.

I had a bad nightmare that lasted all night last night, about me being in the mental hospital. bad.